Let me offer a few examples.
I’ve practiced yoga 🧘♀️ for over 15 years. Movement, breath, and the soaring temperatures that average 105 are my therapy, my church ⛪, and my community. I am a better human because of my practice.
Did I mention it’s about 105 🥵? I’ll also mention that I get there as early as they’ll have me and stay as long as the day allows. I’m typically in the room for 75 + minutes. Needless to say, I’m a sweaty mess every time and I love it!
I’m aware I’m a mess, it’s obvious so I typically go immediately home🏠 to shower.🚿 But one day I had something to drop off to someone and apologized ahead of time for how I would look, feeling more self-conscious than I care to admit. She assured me it was no problem, and I was in and out of her place within 5 minutes.
Later, when we were in a group of people, she teased me in front of others about how disgusting😖 I was that day. Oh wow… ouch! Maybe she meant it to be funny, but it hurt.
A few weeks ago, I had a similar experience. Yes, again after yoga🧘♀️ and a cool shower🚿 at the studio, I didn’t take the time to get fancied up because I had one thing to do before returning home.🏠
As luck ☘️ would have it, I ran into an acquaintance, and we pleasantly chatted for a few minutes. Knowing I didn’t look my best, I didn’t particularly care. My days of trying to impress have quickly been wearing thin but other’s opinions still matter to me.
When we crossed paths again, she told me I looked a little more “myself” without that “idiotic ponytail” I had been wearing. Oh wow… ouch again!!
Why do people feel the need to say such things?
What’s the purpose of speaking to someone in such a fashion?
Do we even understand the power💥 of our words and lasting impact they have?
Is there something about me that makes people feel they can speak to me that way?
How often do we use sarcasm, then try to claim we’re only trying to be funny?
Whatever happened to the childhood saying,
“If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”?
I’ve given these things a lot of thought and am trying to make sense of it.
Yes, I still allow things hurt my feelings.
Yes, I still personalize things I shouldn’t.
Yes, I still give people more power than they deserve.
And, at the same time, words matter and kindness matters too.
Here’s my challenge:
Be conscious of why you’re speaking and the words you choose.
Be mindful of the words you speak and as often as you can,
choose kindness and encouragement.
Below are two helpful acronyms that serve as a powerful filter for your word choice.
W – Why
A – am
I – I
T – talking
What if we all took a second to ask ourselves,
“WAIT, why am I talking and what’s the quality of the words I’m using?”
“What point am I trying to make with this conversation?”
“Is this the message I want to convey and is there a kinder way I can say it?”
Here’s another one.
T – Thoughtful
H – Honest
I – Intelligent
N – Necessary
K – Kind
Imagine running your words through a filter like this?
Would you have anything left to say if you were more intentional with your words?
You matter. Others matter.
Kindness matters. Words matter.
Use your words carefully, intentionally, and respectfully. Let’s bring back some basics in how we treat each another. Let’s help make the world a little bit softer of a place to exist in.