This stage of life is filled with necessary choices, hard truths, difficult decisions, and tough responsibilities.
Why were we in such a hurry to get here⁉️

Part of adulting is accepting reality – seeing things as they are rather than how we think they should be.
It’s funny, really, how often we resist or argue with reality – circumstances, change, the way people behave, traffic🚦, you name it. When something doesn’t go the way we think it should, we resist ❌ and believe it shouldn’t be that way. The only problem… it is that way.

Most of us confuse 🤷‍♀️ acceptance with approval.
They are definitely not the same. 🚫
Just because we accept something does NOT mean we have to like it.👌
Acceptance simply means seeing the reality of a situation and deciding from there.
You don’t have to like the thunderstorm ☔💦⚡⛈️ on the day of your parade, but if you don’t adjust yourself to the reality of it, it could be really dangerous. ☠️
Plan B is critical sometimes, even when you really, really want Plan A.

That’s the hard part… seeing the reality of people, places, and things, even when it’s hurtful, hard, and disappointing.
You don’t have to like it, but you also can’t argue with it. 😠
(Well, you can argue with it but it won’t get you anywhere.)
Part of adulting is accepting things the way they are and making decisions based on the facts, not how you think 🤔 it should be.

Sometimes, people tell themselves they have no choice.
I’ll challenge you on that because that’s rarely the case.
Rarely do you have no choice.
More likely, you have lousy choice A or lousy choice B, and you don’t like either option.
There’s a choice, just not an easy, enjoyable one. 😁
It’s up to you to decide which of the two is the less lousy.
As I said, adulting is totally over-rated!

Even more, the comfort zone is a trap! 🪤 Be careful how long you hang out there.
Learning 👩‍🏫 to do things differently is a choice that involves risk and discomfort. Sometimes, you’re scared of the options, changing your behavior, shaking up relationship patterns, or what people might think of you.
The comfort zone is based on what’s familiar and is one of the most dangerous☠️ places to seek solace.

If you’re struggling with a situation where you have to face some hard choices, I have some grounding tools🛠️ for you.

The S.O.S. (Sense of Self) Toolbox 🧰 is a game changer.

Using and practicing the tools helps give you the inner strength to not only face hard truths, but to make decisions that are right for you.

Self – Awareness:
Pay attention and tune in to your thoughts 💭, feelings, and experiences. Recognize what you’re telling yourself and what’s happening around you.

• Have you gotten acceptance confused with approval or being ok with something?
• Where do you feel you have no choice?
• What reality are you resisting?
• Is there a hard truth you are avoiding?
• What are you struggling to accept – to see things as they are?

Self – Honesty:
Tak a look at any BS story📖 you’re buying into.

• Are you arguing with circumstances and resisting the facts?
• Are you focusing on how things should be rather than how they are?
• Where are you resisting, blaming, or not taking responsibility?
• Where do you need to tell yourself the truth?
• As uncomfortable as they may be, what are your choices?
• Is it really true that you have no choice or are your choices just uncomfortable and unfamiliar?
• What’s your part in this situation, no matter how big or small?

Self – Honoring:
This tool 🛠️ is about changed behavior. Nothing changes until you decide to act differently. Big changes and small changes all matter. Doing what you’ve always done will continue to give you what you’ve always gotten.

• What action steps 👣 can you take to act in your best interest?
• How can changing behavior align you with a healthier outcome?
• What’s one choice you can make to support your well-being?

Self – Responsibility:

I wish people would do what we want them to do. But… they don’t. It’s up to you to take responsibility for your well-being. If something is hurting you, it’s up to you to take action to protect, honor, and take care of yourself. 🫶

• Where do you need to take responsibility for your life?
• Have you been blaming others, making excuses, or falling into the martyred / victim role?
• Are you waiting on someone or something to change for you to feel better?

If you need help with the concept of acceptance, reach out to me. I can help you with the tools and the process of acceptance. Adulting and acceptance can both be challenging but you don’t need to do it alone!